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Friday, July 23, 2010

Men, more men, and Andrew

In the past two days, I've gotten to see more men together than I've seen in a very long time, probably since Esto Vir. One Wednesday, I checked out a pilot meeting of a men's spirituality group that's forming at my church Holy Infant.  These were men old enough to be my dad or my granddad.  Thursday morning, I went to this 6:30 a.m. CBMC (Christian Businessmen Connection) meeting that Jim invited me to the night before.  These men, all Christian businessmen of different denominations, seem to me committed to praying for each other, reading scripture, and reaching out to other men.  There was a presentation with interaction and testimonies.  Wasn't bad at all.  Lastly, last night I hung out with Andrew.  We were originally going to watch a basketball game, but I wanted to do something active, so I suggested we went frisbee golfing.  T'was fun.  

In all three instances, something came alive in me as a man.  There's nothing like a bunch of guys just being together.  But here are my individual take-aways from each experience:

1.) Pilot meeting of men's spirituality group at Holy Infant

You could look in the room, and you could tell that many of the guys in the room hadn't had a chance to be with just other men like that.  When asked why they were there, interest varied from doing service, praying for each other, reading scripture, growing in spiritual life, to simply, not sure, but all of the above.  Some guys weren't really sure why they were there, but they knew they should be there. No one admitted in words the truth I felt was clearly evident---men need men.  Period.  When it's just guys around, from my experience, it's a different, attractive dynamic that guys just need.  It's for our mental, physical, and spiritual sanity.  Men need men.  I'm glad they're starting a group there at my church.

2.) CBMC Meeting

During one of the guy's testimonies, he said a friend shared with him the C3 approach, which I thought was pretty cool.  No, not Chris Paul, CP3, but C3.  He said for the longest time his biggest sin was criticizing his wife.  It's then he picked up the C3 approach, which is something he does when feels the sin is coming.

C1: Call a time out.  Before he starts to think or say something harmful to his wife, he has to call a time out for himself and step back and breathe.

C2: Confess the sin to God.  He tells God in his mind he's sorry for having the harmful thoughts.

and finally,

C3: Choose Christ. " What would Jesus do in the situation?", is what he asks himself.  It's almost always obvious.

My second huge takeaway was one they seemed to preach the hardest in the meeting: the importance of having an intimate relationship with God.  It's funny, because I've read the same message in Wild at Heart, in the current book I'm reading, Be a Man!, and here it's repeated at this meeting.  All disconnected experiences connecting the same dots for true happiness.  And, it's something I've been recently rediscovering for myself in the past month, so it's all very relevant to me.  

Lastly, 3.) Frisbee golf with Andrew

After the meeting yesterday morning, I had a pretty cruddy, unproductive day filled with wasted time on the Internet (Facebook Scrabble, anyone?) and napping.  I could feel myself not wanting to hang out with Andrew anymore, and I knew that was a sure sign that I should be hanging out with him.  I wanted to do something active, and he complied.  Great friend, Mr. Lipetsky is.  In the two other examples, men in groups showed clearly that they needed each other.  Well, I needed Andrew.  To get out and be physically active, and talk guy things, and be stupid.  Men need men.  

Well, that's it for now.  I'm out.


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